Should have thought twice before planning...

Back in December when we lost the baby people started telling me about their own struggles with miscarriage and their experiences with losing a baby. In the beginning most of these stories helped me realize that other people had hurt like I hurt and had survived it. I especially took comfort in how these women went on to have more babies, all who told me their story got pregnant immediately after or even before the doctors "waiting" period ended. Their stories ended with beautiful babies or nice round tummies ready to pop.
I never expected something that brought me so much comfort could turn on me so fast.
After we lost our baby Sam and I wavered on how soon we should try for a another pregnancy we thought we had time to talk it out, but six weeks came fast. Our "waiting period" was over so Sam and I decided to throw caution to the wind. I had heard that a pregnancy can fix a lot of the issues that get in the way of conceiving and that the months following a pregnancy usually prove to be your most fertile. I didn't know if any of this was true or even applied to my situation, but I didn't care fueled by all the storied with happy endings my hopes were sky high. When I received my period later that month, late but as prominent as ever, I was devastated. Logically I knew that it took us months of trying to get pregnant the last time, but I couldn't see that. All I could think about was all those woman who got pregnant right away, how they all had babies to hold or nurseries to decorate. My body failed me again.