No Joking Plan...

As part of our straining moving process Laura and I had to get checkups this morning on base. The doctor offices here insist on asking me questions I consider stupid, they just don't get me.
The form I had to fill out asked: Have you had a recent weight loss? I wrote "I wish”, apparently you were supposed to just check "yes" or "no" not add any comments.
The next question was "How long have you had the issue that brought you in today?” my response "I've had my body my whole life".
Then we got to see a nurse he asked me "what are you taking clomid for?" this one actually left me speechless, no smart retort came to me, I eventually recovered and said "UMM to have a baby". He seemed to find this answer acceptable.
Laura's doctor asked me if she has ever stop breathing in her sleep, I said "I guess not, she's always been alive in the morning".
The pediatrician thought that Laura was now “mature” enough to handle the tough questions and she asked “what would you do if a stranger pulled up with a car full of puppies and asked you to go for a ride?” Laura just looked at her, why would she get in a car full of dogs? When did the creepy pedophiles stop offering candy and adopt so many pets?
Don’t think that I haven’t learned anything in the last 8 years of military doctors though. I learned the hard way that when they ask “Are you having any suicidal thoughts?” Do not answer with “Not recently”.